Wedding Bells

I spent the weekend in the Gurnee, IL area for the wedding of my best friend Grant Murray and Julie Schenning. I have a slew of pictures which I will put up the link to hopefully within the next week or so. This was my first time being in a wedding party as well as being the best man and I thought that I would document the timeline for nostalgia's sake.

Thursday
12:00pm - Done with work.

2:30pm - Navigate surprisingly smoothly through Milwaukee traffic.

3:45pm - Arrive at Casa de Murray

4:45pm - Murray and I grab a couple of brews at a local dive bar called T.G.I. Friday's while we are waiting for Adam (the other best man) and his sister to get into town. Gurnee, IL is the type of area that we had to drink beer in a T.G.I.'s because there are no local bars in sight.

5:30 - Adam, Grant and myself go to After Hours to get our tuxes. You should have to spend a minimum of an hour in your tuxedo when you try it on. That way you'll be able to know things like: the elastic that makes your pants "adjustable" is woefully inadequate in the "keeping your pants up" department, you should have professional assistance available for cufflinks and buttons, and your shoes are going to feel like midieval torture devices after a very short time.

6:30pm - A gourmet dinner of tater tots, roast chicken, and Blue Moon beer.

7:00pm - More Blue Moon.

8:00pm - More Blue Moon and the arrival Dave Graham (groomsman) and his wife Diane who get in from Florida and inform us that they drove most of the way up on a semi-flat tire. Pure guts on his part. I was afraid to drive down there from Wisconsin without getting an oil change first.

8:30pm - No more Blue Moon. B double E double R U N.

9:10pm - Grant, Amanda, Adam and myself return with a case of Miller Lite and a couple bottles of wine.

9:10pm to 11:00pm - Gabbing like kids who haven't seen each other since school got out for the summer.

11:00pm - Lights out.

Friday
8:30am - Donuts and bagels.

9:15am - Go to Sports Cuts for a trim. Apparently telling the haircut specialist that you want the sides and the back trimmed up and to leave the top of your head alone is not enough. You must have to actually wear a cap on your head to indicate: "I really mean it. Don't cut anything off the top of my head." Every person that has ever cut my hair is in agreement that I look simply dashing with a flattop. Jeez.

10:00am - We run into Dave and Diane getting tires changed at Sears Grand in Gurnee Mills Mall.

10:15a - Shopping ensues. I've been to Gurnee Mills just about every time I've visited Grant over the last two years. This is what I've bought: Nautica lanyard ($2.50), Nautica Towel ($12.00), Perry Ellis Belt at T.J. Maxx ($9.99) Not exactly keeping the economy strong.

2:30pm - Grant and I meet his parents and Brian at the hotel the reception is going to be at. We proceeded to pick up the tuxes for Grant's dad, Brian, Pat (his brother) and Pat's two kids. Surprisingly, this turned out to be less of a circus than we'd expected.

3:30pm - Competitive Playstation begins. This is also the point that Brian comes up with this gem: "Nate, there are two types of people in this world. Wolves and everybody else. I'm watching you play this hockey game right now on the Playstation, and you don't look much like a wolf." The mantra of "Be a wolf." stayed with us for the remainder of the weekend.

6:00pm - Wedding rehearsal, which should be renamed "Attempt to keep both families happy." Stand here. Turn now. Walk out now. Got it.

7:30pm - Rehearsal dinner at In-Laws Bar and Restaurant, known far and wide as the "Home of the six dollar rum and coke." Had some good pizza and chicken, though.

9:30pm - The groomsmen retire to Grant's house for some hot cocoa and a rousing game of charades. I'm just kidding, we got lit and Brian tried to burned the house down. The rest of the night we swapped stories with topics including life, love and "Guess who's having another kid."

2:00am - Everyone is in bed except for Dave and myself who are up drinking wine straight out of the bottle and discussing how the government spends $500 on a hammer. Hey, to each their own.

2:30am - Bed time.

Saturday
7:45am - Miraculously, Brian and I are both awake and able to check into our hotel rooms so that we don't have to handle it between the wedding and reception. Very nice rooms in this place.

9:00am - Grant, Brian and I have two jobs: a) drop Grant's car off at the hotel they'll be staying at and b) getting Julie's car washed. Do you know how many other people are getting car washes at 10:00am on a Saturday morning. I'll give you a hint, it's somewhere between "a lot" and "everybody."

11:30am - We show up "late" at Jack Daniels's house (not a joke, Jack Daniels is Julie's brother in law) to make a quick change into our tuxes and then... wait around for two hours. Unfortunately, at this point my head is still pounding from the night before and Jack doesn't have any pain relievers in his possession. No problem, not like I have to stand around for four hours before I get back to the hotel to get some ibuprofen.

2:30pm - What time is it? Wedding time! Hoomph!

3:00pm - I have two jobs in this wedding as best man. Give the rings to the pastor and walk out with Jessica (Julie's sister and matron of honor.) It would have been FANTASTIC if the pastor had said at the rehearsal, "Make sure the rings are not in the box when you give them to me." Help me to help you.

3:30pm - Pictures.
4:00pm - Pictures.
4:30pm - Cocktails! Nope, more pictures.

4:45pm - I have the distinct honor of driving Mr. and Mrs. Murray to the reception. Thankfully they decided to shun the tradition of driving around in a convoy honking the damn horn. That I would not have been able to handle.

5:30pm - Cocktails and a speech from Adam and then yours truly. That was followed by a great dinner featuring chicken, mashed taters and some roast beef.

7:30pm - I get the 45th comment from an Illinoister about how everyone "loved the Yooper accent" in my speech. Whatever.

8:00pm ish - A hilarious ritual ensues after the food is carted away. A time honored tradition designed to stimulate the endorphines and entertain the masses. Of course, I refer to "White People Dancing."

9:00pm - The "great night spot" next door begins filling up with thug like folks, some of whom are getting full-body, airport style searches from the security guards. Ummm, this is the place we are supposed to hang out at after the reception?

9:30pm - Erich, Deana (hope I spelled that right), Melissa, Grant and myself dance to a Puckhead classic, "Sweet Caroline" while each taking turns with the Puckhead helmet on.

10:00pm ish - The garter toss and bouquet toss. I catch neither.

10:30pm - We've now graduated to "Drunk White People Dancing."

11:00pm - Grant tells me that someone "might have shot out the front door of the hotel." Ummm, what!?!? Apparently someone ran a drive by on the front door of the country club. I am not making this up.

11:30pm - Reception is over and we now have two choices. Either go back to the room where we have 10 beers for 5 people -OR- go to the scary night club where there may or may not be several people with handguns. Not a tough decision.

1:30am - The crew that had been hanging out in my room, Erich, Deana, Mel and Shawn retire for the evening.

Sunday
9:00am - Within mere yards of the shot-out front door, my crew and I fearlessly eat a complimentary buffet style breakfast.

10:00am - Grant calls my room to inform me that he left the keys to his car in Julie's vehicle, so I have to go scoop them up at the other hotel.

12:30pm - I head home, left with some great memories and pictures from the weekend I gave my hetero lifemate away.

Congratulations to Grant and Julie. As soon as I have the pictures uploaded, I'll put up the link.

I'm finished,
Nate