Diiing!!!!

First of all, I apologize for the previous post about Mike Jackson. For some reason, I was mistaken for somebody that "talked smack on the 'Legion of Doom' website (?)" and someone much cooler than I (who I'm sure doesn't live in his parent's basement) left all kinds of crazy responses to the post including copious use of profanity. That forced me to delete the message and repost. I don't know. Don't want to know. Don't care. Bunch of weirdos on this Internet.

I've been advised that I need to recap the weekend for the benefit of the folks I spent a majority of the time with. I was invited to a graduation party this weekend for one Ashly "Ash Bash" Shannon in the lovely resort town of Powers, MI. The food was very top shelf and the companionship of friends new (Steve and Nissa) and old (Ash, Jaime and Amy) was unbeatable.

Apparently the organizers of the shindig subscribe to the same belief as I do that a party is not a party until meatballs get involved. These were not just any meatballs however, as I was informed that these were the "Mayor's Meatballs!" True story. Ashly's grandpappy is the mayor of Powers, MI and also makes a mean batch of meatballs. So I loaded up on the Mayor's Meatballs and a stuffing/turkey combination that was equally as good. Topping off the meal for me was some tasty Taco Salad (which may have been made by the Fire Chief of Spalding. I've had unconfirmed reports.)

I guess there's no point in being modest about the subsequent games of bean bags that occupied us for a majority of the afternoon. We dominated at bean bags. For those that aren't familiar, bean bags is a game played with a board about two feet wide and three feet long (on an incline) with a six inch diameter hole near the top of it. You then throw bean bags toward the hole from 30 feet away, followed by Ashly making up a scoring system out of thin air. Along with my tag team partna Steve, Team Nate was undefeated. That win streak included traversing the bracket of what seemed like a double or triple elimination round robin tournament and a 21-0 shellacking of Team Jerry and Larry. Sadly, not even ESPN8 (The Ocho) or Obscure Sports Quarterly came to cover the Shannon Invitational. Each bean bag that made it in the hole was followed by a cry of "Diiiing!" from yours truly (an homage to the Dan Patrick Show on ESPN Radio.)

Finally, the party moved to Escanaba, where we hung out at the Delft or "The Matrixx of Little Bay de Noc area." I had a smattering of mixed drinks, accompanied by enough shots from Steve to get a rhino a DUI...well, if rhino's had cars.

The folks at Escanaba Taxi were nice enough to pick us up at 2:15a outside of the Delft to return us to the Comfort Suites. Due to a provision in the Hudson's restaurant employee discount policy, the room at the Comfort Suites cost us pocket change. Literally. It was less than five bucks a person. A peculiar thing happened between the time we left to go to the bar and the time we got back to the Comfort Suites. Everybody was totally, knee-walking trashed. I've got Ash pukin' in the room, Amy freaking out because we're too loud, Steve being too loud and Jaime rocking back and forth and saying "pizza" over and over again. At one point Ashly made a break for it down the hallway, walking on her knees. Amy and Nate sprung immediately into action, catching the little hellion before she could get to the elevator and go... I'm not sure she actually knew where she was going. Everyone finally got to sleep. Somehow Ashly got into pajamas during the night and puked again during the night. It had been arbitrarily decided that I would be the odd man out when it came to pillows so I spent much of the night with the comfort of windbreaker as a headrest. Everyone parted ways at various times in the morning in various shades of hungover.

My next stop was at Ma and Pa Holtslander's for a little Father's Day burger cookout. My father is going to have a trip to The Olive Garden (or as he thinks of it: "A little slice of Heaven here on Earth") courtesy of the Nate Dogg. The big guy loves the place. I thought the last time my fam was in Green Bay and I suggested that we go to Damon's instead of the Olive Garden that I had created an irreparable rift in my family. We would be known as the "Olive Garden Holtslander Clan" and the "Other Holtslander Clan", forever to fight on the battlefields of the family car, driving around trying to decide where to eat. This conflict was almost settled by the Treaty of Olive Garden on Casaloma Dr., but as of post time is unresolved.

Go Pistons tonight!

I'm finished,
Nate