Ohhhhh, Christian Bale. Christian, Christian, Christian. In case you hadn't heard, Christian Bale went all Veruca Salt on the set of the new Terminator movie last summer. There's a link to the audio below (make sure the kids and the grandparents are out of the room first, unless your grandpa is Quentin Tarantino.) Two things from this:
a) I hope to God someone digitally enhances the clip using the "Batman voice".
b) At one point he asks the movie's director, "McG! You have f*%kin' something to say to this prick?!" I think this is hilarious. Does anyone call McG by his real name? He has a real name. It's Joseph (thank you, Wikipedia.) It must make for interesting holidays:
"Hey Joe, can you pass the green beans? Joe? Joseph?"
"McG, some green beans over here, please?"
"Yes, I know you directed Charlie's Angels."
"Yes, I see. You have Drew Barrymore's cell phone number in your Blackberry. Awesome."
"Yeah, I know you're the only one at the table with a Blackberry."
(Quick side note: I heart MgG. He executive produced "The O.C." and created the short lived TV show "Fastlane". Two of my favorite vices.)
If I get this "Barack Obama Stimulus Check" that I see advertised all over the internet, does it come from the US Treasury, or is it just a personal check from the commander-in-chief's LaSalle Bank checking account?
USA Swimming has suspended Michael Phelps for three months in response to pictures that surface of him doing an individual medley on a water bong. Because apparently an actual slap on the wrist would be too harsh a punishment. Let's be honest, the next swim meet we care about is more than 3 years away in London. Wow, they really taught him a lesson! But what about the World Championships, the Nationwide Series of swim meets? Nope, he'll be unsuspended by then, too. It's like grounding a kid right up until the week before prom.
Does anyone still realize that there was a show that came before "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition" that was just called "Extreme Makeover"? It's true. It ran for about five years and they would give people plastic surgery and stuff. Eventually "Home Edition" became uber popular for reasons that may only be known to Ty Pennington and Beelzebub himself. I like to think of the original "Makeover" as the Johnny Drama of reality shows.
There is a Gillette razor commercial that depicts athletic deities Tiger Woods and Roger Federer fighting over a Fusion razor. In the latter parts of their pursuit of this razor, they both stop and seem intrigued that the blades for the razor can be had for what amounts to a mere $1 per day. OK, seeing as Tiger Woods basically prints money in his basement, I really don't believe that would be a big deal to him. If he was taken aback by a sign saying, "You can stay at the Bridge Suite at the Atlantis Resort in the Bahamas for only $20,000 per night", that I might believe.
If you're in the market for facial tissues (and who isn't this time of year? Am I right?) then let me suggest to you Puffs Plus Lotion with the scent of Vicks. The cool menthol smell will make you feel like you're blowing your honker with a Newport cigarette. The lotion is gentle on your skin so you won't end up looking like Ray Liotta when he's all coked up towards the end of "GoodFellas." I should write commercials.
There is a brand of orange juice called "Simply Orange" that comes in mango and pineapple flavors. Not so simple after all, is it?
I'm finished,
Nate
Christian Bale taking himself a little too seriously:
http://www.aolcdn.com/tmz_
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