First of all, I apologize for the previous post about Mike Jackson. For some reason, I was mistaken for somebody that "talked smack on the 'Legion of Doom' website (?)" and someone much cooler than I (who I'm sure doesn't live in his parent's basement) left all kinds of crazy responses to the post including copious use of profanity. That forced me to delete the message and repost. I don't know. Don't want to know. Don't care. Bunch of weirdos on this Internet.
I've been advised that I need to recap the weekend for the benefit of the folks I spent a majority of the time with. I was invited to a graduation party this weekend for one Ashly "Ash Bash" Shannon in the lovely resort town of Powers, MI. The food was very top shelf and the companionship of friends new (Steve and Nissa) and old (Ash, Jaime and Amy) was unbeatable.
Apparently the organizers of the shindig subscribe to the same belief as I do that a party is not a party until meatballs get involved. These were not just any meatballs however, as I was informed that these were the "Mayor's Meatballs!" True story. Ashly's grandpappy is the mayor of Powers, MI and also makes a mean batch of meatballs. So I loaded up on the Mayor's Meatballs and a stuffing/turkey combination that was equally as good. Topping off the meal for me was some tasty Taco Salad (which may have been made by the Fire Chief of Spalding. I've had unconfirmed reports.)
I guess there's no point in being modest about the subsequent games of bean bags that occupied us for a majority of the afternoon. We dominated at bean bags. For those that aren't familiar, bean bags is a game played with a board about two feet wide and three feet long (on an incline) with a six inch diameter hole near the top of it. You then throw bean bags toward the hole from 30 feet away, followed by Ashly making up a scoring system out of thin air. Along with my tag team partna Steve, Team Nate was undefeated. That win streak included traversing the bracket of what seemed like a double or triple elimination round robin tournament and a 21-0 shellacking of Team Jerry and Larry. Sadly, not even ESPN8 (The Ocho) or Obscure Sports Quarterly came to cover the Shannon Invitational. Each bean bag that made it in the hole was followed by a cry of "Diiiing!" from yours truly (an homage to the Dan Patrick Show on ESPN Radio.)
Finally, the party moved to Escanaba, where we hung out at the Delft or "The Matrixx of Little Bay de Noc area." I had a smattering of mixed drinks, accompanied by enough shots from Steve to get a rhino a DUI...well, if rhino's had cars.
The folks at Escanaba Taxi were nice enough to pick us up at 2:15a outside of the Delft to return us to the Comfort Suites. Due to a provision in the Hudson's restaurant employee discount policy, the room at the Comfort Suites cost us pocket change. Literally. It was less than five bucks a person. A peculiar thing happened between the time we left to go to the bar and the time we got back to the Comfort Suites. Everybody was totally, knee-walking trashed. I've got Ash pukin' in the room, Amy freaking out because we're too loud, Steve being too loud and Jaime rocking back and forth and saying "pizza" over and over again. At one point Ashly made a break for it down the hallway, walking on her knees. Amy and Nate sprung immediately into action, catching the little hellion before she could get to the elevator and go... I'm not sure she actually knew where she was going. Everyone finally got to sleep. Somehow Ashly got into pajamas during the night and puked again during the night. It had been arbitrarily decided that I would be the odd man out when it came to pillows so I spent much of the night with the comfort of windbreaker as a headrest. Everyone parted ways at various times in the morning in various shades of hungover.
My next stop was at Ma and Pa Holtslander's for a little Father's Day burger cookout. My father is going to have a trip to The Olive Garden (or as he thinks of it: "A little slice of Heaven here on Earth") courtesy of the Nate Dogg. The big guy loves the place. I thought the last time my fam was in Green Bay and I suggested that we go to Damon's instead of the Olive Garden that I had created an irreparable rift in my family. We would be known as the "Olive Garden Holtslander Clan" and the "Other Holtslander Clan", forever to fight on the battlefields of the family car, driving around trying to decide where to eat. This conflict was almost settled by the Treaty of Olive Garden on Casaloma Dr., but as of post time is unresolved.
Go Pistons tonight!
I'm finished,
Nate
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
"Do You Remember The Time?"
Everyone can relax now, the anticipation and anxiousness that was the Michael Jackson trial is finally over. Wow, I can't believe I just wrote that. I think the real tragedy here is not in the fact that Michael Jackson was prosecuted (or persecuted, depending who you ask) for heinous crimes against children, it lies in the fact that everything was so believable. Not one of us actually said to ourselves, "There's no way he did what they are accusing him of." Jacko has gone so nuts in the last 15 years that nothing is beyond the scope of believability. Is that fair? Just because he has a ferris wheel in his front yard, said publicly that it is OK for grown men to sleep with boys and has already settled lawsuits with molestation accusers in the past; is that enough to automatically think he was guilty in this situation. My answer is: It doesn't help.
Do I personally think he was guilty? I believe the story has to be given some credibility (mostly because of his past eccentricities), but the case was handled poorly. The fact is, the prosecution could not produce one shred of physical evidence and had only the accusations of shaky witnesses combined with some hired guns to come in to attempt a failed character assassination. The prosecutor apparently forgot about that pesky burden of proof thing.
In any case, Michael Jackson has experienced one of the most dramatic falls from grace in our lifetime. This guy was the friggin' King of Pop at one time! He sold records like nobody had since Elvis. The album "Thriller" (at one time the best selling album of all time, now second to The Eagles) sold 26 million copies in the US. To put that in perspective, "Hit Me Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears and "Abbey Road" by the Beatles sold 26 million albums combined. Oh, and it did all right in the rest of the world too, at over 63 million copies sold. His worst selling album ever, 2001's "Invincible," still went double platinum. Looking back on his body of solo work (not including the huge successes with the Jackson 5), he only released five major albums and sold 57 million units in the US alone.
Michael also had an unrivaled marketing touch. He pitched for both Coke and Pepsi and LA Gear named a shoe after him (quite an accomplishment in an era where only tall guys named Jordan had shoes bearing their name.) Even when he inexplicably started turning white and wearing what looked like military commander Halloween costumes, he was still the biggest draw in the free world and otherwise. He was The Beatles of his era.
Since the first whispers of molestation began, Mikey has been on a free fall at what seems like terminal velocity. He's had facelifts apparently done by the George Lucas Creature Shop. He's dangled one of his children from a balcony window. He's admitted that he thinks it is "natural" to sleep in the same bed with young boys. He named a kid "Blanket." Even in his most trying hour, with his freedom for the better part of the next two decades on the line (in the recent criminal trial), he seemed to be blowing off the "real" world. He showed up late to court, showed up once in pajama pants and once did a dance routine on top of a vehicle while leaving the courthouse.
My take is that it is a case of us expecting too much from a fragile human being who happens to be famous. From some accounts, Michael Jackson is a broken man and the butt of countless jokes. He will probably go down in history like Howard Hughes, Mike Tyson, and Ol' Dirty Bastard, remembered more for his eccentricities and scandals than for his professional accomplishments. Somehow, I just managed to make a correlation between one of the biggest pop stars of all time and a rapper that wanted to be known either as Dirt McGirt or Big Baby Jesus. Perhaps such an eventual eulogy an unfair punishment for a man who seems tormented in his own skin or a fitting sentence for someone who thumbed his nose at much of the things we consider normal. Even now the talking heads refer to him as the "self proclaimed King of Pop" as if they never bought in to the hype in the first place. They bought in just like acid wash and New Kids on the Block and every other "embarrassing" thing from the past. Maybe it feels good to disregard him now as "Wacko Jacko." Every once in a while however, it is nice to look back on him as "The King."
I'm finished,
Nate
Do I personally think he was guilty? I believe the story has to be given some credibility (mostly because of his past eccentricities), but the case was handled poorly. The fact is, the prosecution could not produce one shred of physical evidence and had only the accusations of shaky witnesses combined with some hired guns to come in to attempt a failed character assassination. The prosecutor apparently forgot about that pesky burden of proof thing.
In any case, Michael Jackson has experienced one of the most dramatic falls from grace in our lifetime. This guy was the friggin' King of Pop at one time! He sold records like nobody had since Elvis. The album "Thriller" (at one time the best selling album of all time, now second to The Eagles) sold 26 million copies in the US. To put that in perspective, "Hit Me Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears and "Abbey Road" by the Beatles sold 26 million albums combined. Oh, and it did all right in the rest of the world too, at over 63 million copies sold. His worst selling album ever, 2001's "Invincible," still went double platinum. Looking back on his body of solo work (not including the huge successes with the Jackson 5), he only released five major albums and sold 57 million units in the US alone.
Michael also had an unrivaled marketing touch. He pitched for both Coke and Pepsi and LA Gear named a shoe after him (quite an accomplishment in an era where only tall guys named Jordan had shoes bearing their name.) Even when he inexplicably started turning white and wearing what looked like military commander Halloween costumes, he was still the biggest draw in the free world and otherwise. He was The Beatles of his era.
Since the first whispers of molestation began, Mikey has been on a free fall at what seems like terminal velocity. He's had facelifts apparently done by the George Lucas Creature Shop. He's dangled one of his children from a balcony window. He's admitted that he thinks it is "natural" to sleep in the same bed with young boys. He named a kid "Blanket." Even in his most trying hour, with his freedom for the better part of the next two decades on the line (in the recent criminal trial), he seemed to be blowing off the "real" world. He showed up late to court, showed up once in pajama pants and once did a dance routine on top of a vehicle while leaving the courthouse.
My take is that it is a case of us expecting too much from a fragile human being who happens to be famous. From some accounts, Michael Jackson is a broken man and the butt of countless jokes. He will probably go down in history like Howard Hughes, Mike Tyson, and Ol' Dirty Bastard, remembered more for his eccentricities and scandals than for his professional accomplishments. Somehow, I just managed to make a correlation between one of the biggest pop stars of all time and a rapper that wanted to be known either as Dirt McGirt or Big Baby Jesus. Perhaps such an eventual eulogy an unfair punishment for a man who seems tormented in his own skin or a fitting sentence for someone who thumbed his nose at much of the things we consider normal. Even now the talking heads refer to him as the "self proclaimed King of Pop" as if they never bought in to the hype in the first place. They bought in just like acid wash and New Kids on the Block and every other "embarrassing" thing from the past. Maybe it feels good to disregard him now as "Wacko Jacko." Every once in a while however, it is nice to look back on him as "The King."
I'm finished,
Nate
Wednesday, June 01, 2005
Stars and Stripes and What Not.
I've got a lot to talk about after the loooooong Memorial Day weekend (off Friday through Tuesday.) Let's get started!
Swallow Inn Fish Fry- Perhaps I am a little biased on this because it is from my favorite, nay, only watering hole in the Rapid River area that I frequent. This stuff is good, yo. The main show is of course the fish, but you are definately cheating yourself if you don't try the taco salad on the salad bar. After a couple of more pops I took my fish to go and went home to eat with the folks.
Swallow Inn Friday Night- Had a good time conversing with the usual crowd: Kurt, Johnny, Holmgren, Cole, etc... Got a shot from Johnny later in the night as payment "for that time I stayed at your place in Marquette." Someone should tell him that was over a year and a half ago, I think he's bought me beers and shots already for it and it wasn't that big of an imposition in the first place. Somebody else tell him, though... free shots is free shots. Got a sober ride home from Ashley, who got into town around midnight. Funniest point of the night: I get a call at about 10:45 from Ashley. She says, "I just saw a sign that said 20 miles to Rapid River." It sounded a little suspect that she'd be almost to Escanaba, but I shrug it off and go back to my beer. So we wait...and wait...and wait. I get a call a little bit later: "I think that sign said 20 miles to Cedar River. I'm just getting to Escanaba now." Ah, the intricasies of navigating the great Upper Peninsula.
Wedding Bells!- My buddy from way back in the day (like "the first person I ever considered a friend" back in the day), Eric Lundin got married on Saturday. They look like a lovely couple. It was good to see Eric and talk to him in friendly tones again. My years of jackassery at Northern alienated many people and I suspect that Eric fell into that group (obviously through no fault of his own.) It felt great to have all the boys back together; Bruno, Bergman, Lundin and myself. Between the three of them, I think I can account for about 90% of my good memories from back home. We also made up 100% of the 1997 High School Bowl team that was one bad judgement call away from making the "Smart 16." We four shall never meet again... well until someone else gets married. My money's on Bruno. Quote of the wedding: Bergman: "You're staying at home? Oh. Cause I've got a room here for the night if you're interested." Me: "Um. You know how that sounded, don't you." Bergman: "That's not what I meant."
Memorial Day- Same ol parade, less people you recognize, and no beer tent. Yeah, could've skipped that.
I'm finished,
Nate
Swallow Inn Fish Fry- Perhaps I am a little biased on this because it is from my favorite, nay, only watering hole in the Rapid River area that I frequent. This stuff is good, yo. The main show is of course the fish, but you are definately cheating yourself if you don't try the taco salad on the salad bar. After a couple of more pops I took my fish to go and went home to eat with the folks.
Swallow Inn Friday Night- Had a good time conversing with the usual crowd: Kurt, Johnny, Holmgren, Cole, etc... Got a shot from Johnny later in the night as payment "for that time I stayed at your place in Marquette." Someone should tell him that was over a year and a half ago, I think he's bought me beers and shots already for it and it wasn't that big of an imposition in the first place. Somebody else tell him, though... free shots is free shots. Got a sober ride home from Ashley, who got into town around midnight. Funniest point of the night: I get a call at about 10:45 from Ashley. She says, "I just saw a sign that said 20 miles to Rapid River." It sounded a little suspect that she'd be almost to Escanaba, but I shrug it off and go back to my beer. So we wait...and wait...and wait. I get a call a little bit later: "I think that sign said 20 miles to Cedar River. I'm just getting to Escanaba now." Ah, the intricasies of navigating the great Upper Peninsula.
Wedding Bells!- My buddy from way back in the day (like "the first person I ever considered a friend" back in the day), Eric Lundin got married on Saturday. They look like a lovely couple. It was good to see Eric and talk to him in friendly tones again. My years of jackassery at Northern alienated many people and I suspect that Eric fell into that group (obviously through no fault of his own.) It felt great to have all the boys back together; Bruno, Bergman, Lundin and myself. Between the three of them, I think I can account for about 90% of my good memories from back home. We also made up 100% of the 1997 High School Bowl team that was one bad judgement call away from making the "Smart 16." We four shall never meet again... well until someone else gets married. My money's on Bruno. Quote of the wedding: Bergman: "You're staying at home? Oh. Cause I've got a room here for the night if you're interested." Me: "Um. You know how that sounded, don't you." Bergman: "That's not what I meant."
Memorial Day- Same ol parade, less people you recognize, and no beer tent. Yeah, could've skipped that.
I'm finished,
Nate
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
Our Trip To Seattle.
As most of you may know, Ashley and I recently took a vacation to the beautiful Pacific Northwest. Here is a brief synopsis of our trip:
1) Pike Place Market- I almost contemplated calling Grant while we were walking through the place on Monday and putting him on speakerphone to get an "Overrated!" chant going. It is rated as the spot to see in Seattle by all the tourism publications. It would be if you were looking to buy fresh flowers, fruit or fish (not exactly things you're going to bring back in your suitcase.) For those that are unfamiliar, Pike Place is a huge farmer's/flea
market down near the waterfront. It is a neat place, don't get me wrong. It just is not a place I can see myself spending an entire day, as some tourism publications suggest that you do. We did go to the first Starbucks ever, which is located near the Market. So at least we've got that going for us.
2) Red Sox v. Mariners- Bad News: Sox lost. Good news: Papi and Manny went deep for the Sox. (Manny's 400th) Even Better News: Pyramid Brewery right across the street. Seriously, Pyramid Hefeweizen almost turned me off to regular cheap beer forever. Almost.
3) Space Needle- This one needs no introduction. I'm sure the residents of Seattle get sick of seeing the monument to the World's Fair, but I thought it was wicked cool. I actually never realized the thing had outside observation opportunities at the top. The view is actually a little bit better from the observation deck of the Bank of America tower (which was a pleasant surprise) but the Space Needle was still pretty fetch. I also liked the monorail which ran from the Space Needle back to downtown. It saves time (it's about a 2 minute ride station to station) and the frustration of figuring out which bus gets you back to where you need to go.
4) Scenic View/Snoqualmie Falls - The advantage we had over every one else who goes to Seattle on vacation was that we had the guidance of the homeboy Beej and the homegirl Kate. Meaning we got to experience stuff most tourists wouldn't know was there. On top of Queen Anne Hill (one of the ritzier neighborhoods in Seattle) there is a small overlook called Kerry Park which provides the best overview of the city without a helicopter. Also, they brought us out to Snoqualmie Falls, a beautiful waterfall (the second tallest in Washington) for a quick stop. Apparently, Snoqualmie just touches the edge of Rainier National Park. Speaking of Rainier...
5) Mt. Rainier - Never saw the thing. We were there for five days and the clouds never parted enough for us to see it. Bummer.
6) IMAX theater- Saw Lewis & Clark - Great Journey West at the IMAX theater near the Space Needle. Simply an awesome experience. Educational, but awesome.
7) Experience Music Project (EMP)/Sci-Fi Hall of Fame- If you ever venture to Seattle, by all means, skip the EMP. You know that feeling you get when you pay full price at the theater to see a really bad movie? Multiply by ten and you would have the EMP. I cannot stress this enough. DO NOT believe the significant hype. I enjoyed the Sci-Fi museum, however. There will be two types of people that go to the Sci-Fi Hall: Those who say, "Lame." and those like me that are blabbing, "A full size replica of the queen from "Alien"!?!? A Predator mask!?!? They have the original script of the classic Star Trek episode 'The Trouble with Tribbles!' This is legit as hell!" Needless to say, I was one for two on the enjoyment of these attractions which are in the same building.
8) Comedy Underground- In the hallowed halls where comedy greats like the late Mitch Hedberg and Caroline Rhea once performed, we saw a good comedy show (which was graded as mediocre by Beej) on Saturday. Perhaps I thought everything was funnier considering I had slept about four of the previous thirty-five hours (Plane Insomnia strikes again.)
9) The seafood - The Halibut & Chips I had at The Crab Pot on Wednesday night were yummy like you read about. I didn't know they could fry fish that well and you can never fully appreciate popcorn shrimp at Red Lobster again after you've had it at the Crab Pot. They had a shirt there that simply stated, "Got crabs?" A funny novelty shirt, except that it did not say anywhere on the front or back that it was from The Crab Pot restaurant. That is a joke that needs to be immediately qualified.
10) The bus- We utilized the public transportation of King County about as well as can be expected for a couple of Wisconsinites. The undisputed highlight of the bus trips was seeing two hooligans get arrested at the bus stop in Redmond for spraying graffiti on a wall. When parking for the day in Seattle costs $7+ and parking at the bus stop a mile from Beej and Kate's to take a round trip into the city costs $8 total... you do the math. We also spent a lot of time walking around downtown. There's nothing quite like a walk uphill from 1st Ave to 4th Ave to let you know precisely how out of shape you really are.
11) Otters - One of the things I wanted to see was the Seattle Aquarium. It is certainly not the largest or most modern aquarium in the world, but it did have... Otters! They float on their backs and do cute little human things with their hands! The best part about the Aquarium is that they have a seafood restaurant on the street level. A seafood restaurant at an aquarium! "Our special of the day is 'Fish That Was Not Interesting Enough To Have In The Aquarium and Chips.' That also comes with side salad."
In closing, we had a ton of fun. If I think of anything I neglected to mention, I will update further in the future.
I'm finished,
Nate
1) Pike Place Market- I almost contemplated calling Grant while we were walking through the place on Monday and putting him on speakerphone to get an "Overrated!" chant going. It is rated as the spot to see in Seattle by all the tourism publications. It would be if you were looking to buy fresh flowers, fruit or fish (not exactly things you're going to bring back in your suitcase.) For those that are unfamiliar, Pike Place is a huge farmer's/flea
market down near the waterfront. It is a neat place, don't get me wrong. It just is not a place I can see myself spending an entire day, as some tourism publications suggest that you do. We did go to the first Starbucks ever, which is located near the Market. So at least we've got that going for us.
2) Red Sox v. Mariners- Bad News: Sox lost. Good news: Papi and Manny went deep for the Sox. (Manny's 400th) Even Better News: Pyramid Brewery right across the street. Seriously, Pyramid Hefeweizen almost turned me off to regular cheap beer forever. Almost.
3) Space Needle- This one needs no introduction. I'm sure the residents of Seattle get sick of seeing the monument to the World's Fair, but I thought it was wicked cool. I actually never realized the thing had outside observation opportunities at the top. The view is actually a little bit better from the observation deck of the Bank of America tower (which was a pleasant surprise) but the Space Needle was still pretty fetch. I also liked the monorail which ran from the Space Needle back to downtown. It saves time (it's about a 2 minute ride station to station) and the frustration of figuring out which bus gets you back to where you need to go.
4) Scenic View/Snoqualmie Falls - The advantage we had over every one else who goes to Seattle on vacation was that we had the guidance of the homeboy Beej and the homegirl Kate. Meaning we got to experience stuff most tourists wouldn't know was there. On top of Queen Anne Hill (one of the ritzier neighborhoods in Seattle) there is a small overlook called Kerry Park which provides the best overview of the city without a helicopter. Also, they brought us out to Snoqualmie Falls, a beautiful waterfall (the second tallest in Washington) for a quick stop. Apparently, Snoqualmie just touches the edge of Rainier National Park. Speaking of Rainier...
5) Mt. Rainier - Never saw the thing. We were there for five days and the clouds never parted enough for us to see it. Bummer.
6) IMAX theater- Saw Lewis & Clark - Great Journey West at the IMAX theater near the Space Needle. Simply an awesome experience. Educational, but awesome.
7) Experience Music Project (EMP)/Sci-Fi Hall of Fame- If you ever venture to Seattle, by all means, skip the EMP. You know that feeling you get when you pay full price at the theater to see a really bad movie? Multiply by ten and you would have the EMP. I cannot stress this enough. DO NOT believe the significant hype. I enjoyed the Sci-Fi museum, however. There will be two types of people that go to the Sci-Fi Hall: Those who say, "Lame." and those like me that are blabbing, "A full size replica of the queen from "Alien"!?!? A Predator mask!?!? They have the original script of the classic Star Trek episode 'The Trouble with Tribbles!' This is legit as hell!" Needless to say, I was one for two on the enjoyment of these attractions which are in the same building.
8) Comedy Underground- In the hallowed halls where comedy greats like the late Mitch Hedberg and Caroline Rhea once performed, we saw a good comedy show (which was graded as mediocre by Beej) on Saturday. Perhaps I thought everything was funnier considering I had slept about four of the previous thirty-five hours (Plane Insomnia strikes again.)
9) The seafood - The Halibut & Chips I had at The Crab Pot on Wednesday night were yummy like you read about. I didn't know they could fry fish that well and you can never fully appreciate popcorn shrimp at Red Lobster again after you've had it at the Crab Pot. They had a shirt there that simply stated, "Got crabs?" A funny novelty shirt, except that it did not say anywhere on the front or back that it was from The Crab Pot restaurant. That is a joke that needs to be immediately qualified.
10) The bus- We utilized the public transportation of King County about as well as can be expected for a couple of Wisconsinites. The undisputed highlight of the bus trips was seeing two hooligans get arrested at the bus stop in Redmond for spraying graffiti on a wall. When parking for the day in Seattle costs $7+ and parking at the bus stop a mile from Beej and Kate's to take a round trip into the city costs $8 total... you do the math. We also spent a lot of time walking around downtown. There's nothing quite like a walk uphill from 1st Ave to 4th Ave to let you know precisely how out of shape you really are.
11) Otters - One of the things I wanted to see was the Seattle Aquarium. It is certainly not the largest or most modern aquarium in the world, but it did have... Otters! They float on their backs and do cute little human things with their hands! The best part about the Aquarium is that they have a seafood restaurant on the street level. A seafood restaurant at an aquarium! "Our special of the day is 'Fish That Was Not Interesting Enough To Have In The Aquarium and Chips.' That also comes with side salad."
In closing, we had a ton of fun. If I think of anything I neglected to mention, I will update further in the future.
I'm finished,
Nate
Monday, April 25, 2005
Holy smoke!
The week following tax season is kind of like the week after a hurricane here at Thrivent Financial. You get blown around violently for a while, and then suddenly everything is eerily still. Everybody should have their taxes done by now and if they don't... it's not like we weren't available. I think a collective sigh of relief was let out by all of us here in the call center. I know I spent Friday basking in the afterglow of being done with a frazzeling few months.
I have a couple of questions about the new pope, Benedict XVI. It has nothing to do with the obvious questions: Does he hate gays? Will he attempt to unify with other religions and sects? Is there any truth to the accusation that he was a Nazi? My question is this: Doesn't anybody in Italy work? The pope gets elected and there's like 100,000 people there who've been waiting all day... for like three days. Go to work, hippies! Also, the powers that be at the church decided that "to avoid any confusion" they would ring the bells along with the white smoke to signify that there was a new pope. Great idea, except for one thing: They ring the bell every fifteen friggin' minutes already. So the first afternoon they let out the black smoke, signifying no new pope, so everybody leaves. Then five minutes later at quarter after, the bells start ringing and everyone comes flooding back. They of course find out that it was, indeed, black smoke. Way to clear up the confusion. Next time, just have someone make a noise like a dying giraffe when a new pope is elected. Just for simplicity's sake. Why can't there just be fireworks? There'd be no confusion with a huge papal fireworks display. I'm not Catholic and I certainly don't claim to be an expert on the pope selection comittee but I'm just thinking fireworks would be awesome. That's all for now.
I'm finished,
Nate
I have a couple of questions about the new pope, Benedict XVI. It has nothing to do with the obvious questions: Does he hate gays? Will he attempt to unify with other religions and sects? Is there any truth to the accusation that he was a Nazi? My question is this: Doesn't anybody in Italy work? The pope gets elected and there's like 100,000 people there who've been waiting all day... for like three days. Go to work, hippies! Also, the powers that be at the church decided that "to avoid any confusion" they would ring the bells along with the white smoke to signify that there was a new pope. Great idea, except for one thing: They ring the bell every fifteen friggin' minutes already. So the first afternoon they let out the black smoke, signifying no new pope, so everybody leaves. Then five minutes later at quarter after, the bells start ringing and everyone comes flooding back. They of course find out that it was, indeed, black smoke. Way to clear up the confusion. Next time, just have someone make a noise like a dying giraffe when a new pope is elected. Just for simplicity's sake. Why can't there just be fireworks? There'd be no confusion with a huge papal fireworks display. I'm not Catholic and I certainly don't claim to be an expert on the pope selection comittee but I'm just thinking fireworks would be awesome. That's all for now.
I'm finished,
Nate
Monday, March 28, 2005
I'm all in?
Hope everyone had a good Easter (or to Jaime, I hope you had fun with whatever pagan Costa Rican holiday they were celebrating.) The Easter Bunny made a quick stop in Appleton leaving candy and Tiger Woods 2004 for PS2. That game is like a domesticated wolf, you know it's supposed to be harmless, but you're almost afraid to have it in the house. It is the most addictive game I have ever played, period. I don't even particularily like golf, yet I'm sitting there after two straight hours of playing, deciding between a pitch and a flop from 35 feet away from the pin.
Taxes rule! Even though it accounts for 75% of the phone calls I get at work and the next three weeks are going to be pure hell, taxes kick butt. They run the government, they keep wasteful social programs "that I love" alive, and most importantly, for some of us, they give us money back. I got my tax return on Friday! Yay! For once, I may even stick to a plan on how I will spend it. I shouldn't actually be happy about getting a return. As every good Republican should know, tax refunds are the return of an interest free loan that you just gave to the government. But when you check the balance of your bank account online and that return is staring you in the face, it's like butterflies being released in the stomach, isn't it? I made out like a bandit even though I had part time residence in both the UP and Wisky this year (I think I owe Michigan like $9.)
The Seattle trip is coming together nicely. We have our plane tickets and BJ and Kate will be picking up the tickets to see the Mariners and THE 2004 WORLD CHAMPION BOSTON RED SOX!!!!! HURRAH! GO SOX! Oh, and we're going to see some other stuff like a museum and some Space Needle thing, and THE 2004 WORLD SERIES CHAMPION RED SOX! This is the first vacation of my adult life and it is going to kick the butt and take the names, fool. But it is still well over a month away. Sad.
Finally, am I sick of hearing about poker. Wow, am I ever. Ever since ESPN started airing the World Series of Poker regularly, you can't get away from it. The worst part is the stories. This or a variation of this is every poker story I've ever heard:
Some Guy: "So, I was playing poker last night, Nate."
Me: (sigh) "Oh, really?"
Some Guy: "Do you play cards?"
Me: "No, it's not really my thing."
Some Guy: "So anyways, I almost won. I had this flush going after "the flop", then after "the river" it was just me and this other guy. I was thinking he probably had a flush too but I had a Queen high so I went all in. The Ace was already out there, so the only thing he could have that would've beat me was a King. Guess what he had?"
Me: "Umm, a King? Probably?"
Some Guy: "Sure did! I was so pissed!"
Me: "Umm. Tough luck I guess." I don't blame the people for being excited, it's just that I don't have anything to add to the conversation and I feel like an idiot. Enough with the poker!
I'm finished,
Nate
Taxes rule! Even though it accounts for 75% of the phone calls I get at work and the next three weeks are going to be pure hell, taxes kick butt. They run the government, they keep wasteful social programs "that I love" alive, and most importantly, for some of us, they give us money back. I got my tax return on Friday! Yay! For once, I may even stick to a plan on how I will spend it. I shouldn't actually be happy about getting a return. As every good Republican should know, tax refunds are the return of an interest free loan that you just gave to the government. But when you check the balance of your bank account online and that return is staring you in the face, it's like butterflies being released in the stomach, isn't it? I made out like a bandit even though I had part time residence in both the UP and Wisky this year (I think I owe Michigan like $9.)
The Seattle trip is coming together nicely. We have our plane tickets and BJ and Kate will be picking up the tickets to see the Mariners and THE 2004 WORLD CHAMPION BOSTON RED SOX!!!!! HURRAH! GO SOX! Oh, and we're going to see some other stuff like a museum and some Space Needle thing, and THE 2004 WORLD SERIES CHAMPION RED SOX! This is the first vacation of my adult life and it is going to kick the butt and take the names, fool. But it is still well over a month away. Sad.
Finally, am I sick of hearing about poker. Wow, am I ever. Ever since ESPN started airing the World Series of Poker regularly, you can't get away from it. The worst part is the stories. This or a variation of this is every poker story I've ever heard:
Some Guy: "So, I was playing poker last night, Nate."
Me: (sigh) "Oh, really?"
Some Guy: "Do you play cards?"
Me: "No, it's not really my thing."
Some Guy: "So anyways, I almost won. I had this flush going after "the flop", then after "the river" it was just me and this other guy. I was thinking he probably had a flush too but I had a Queen high so I went all in. The Ace was already out there, so the only thing he could have that would've beat me was a King. Guess what he had?"
Me: "Umm, a King? Probably?"
Some Guy: "Sure did! I was so pissed!"
Me: "Umm. Tough luck I guess." I don't blame the people for being excited, it's just that I don't have anything to add to the conversation and I feel like an idiot. Enough with the poker!
I'm finished,
Nate
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
Shark attacks and the people confused by them.
Happy holy week to all. For most people it means you're geeked about having Good Friday off. Because I already have Friday off normally, this week is a little shorter, as I was compensated by getting to come in two hours later every day this week. Not bad as I have been fighting an upstart Nate Virus since last week. It has yet to turn the corner into a full fledged debilitator and hopefully it will not. I even called in sick on Tuesday as a preemptive strike.
So, I've seen a commercial for this "Spring Break: Shark Attack!" movie that CBS is putting out. It's kind of like Jaws with more of the O.C. and less believability. I thought that we were getting away from such things as cheesy shark attack movies and that we held our entertainment today to a higher standard of factual accuracy. I guess a walk down any Blockbuster movie will yield its share of cheesy straight-to-video movies ("Skulls III" anyone?), but I thought for mainstream media, shark attack movies were a little too laughable. I hoping that next summer Fox does a made-for-TV tie in with Austin Powers called "Attack of the Sharks With Friggin' Laser Beams on Their Heads." Maybe we could go "Jaws 6: Son of Jaws."
Oh, and I've gotta share a movie quote from a campy, funny movie I saw this weekend.
RANDOM MOVIE QUOTE!!
Senator Abercrombie's Wife: "I just don't know why every time a rich white man is against immigrants he's labled a racist."
- "A Day Without A Mexican" (2004)
I'm finished,
Nate
So, I've seen a commercial for this "Spring Break: Shark Attack!" movie that CBS is putting out. It's kind of like Jaws with more of the O.C. and less believability. I thought that we were getting away from such things as cheesy shark attack movies and that we held our entertainment today to a higher standard of factual accuracy. I guess a walk down any Blockbuster movie will yield its share of cheesy straight-to-video movies ("Skulls III" anyone?), but I thought for mainstream media, shark attack movies were a little too laughable. I hoping that next summer Fox does a made-for-TV tie in with Austin Powers called "Attack of the Sharks With Friggin' Laser Beams on Their Heads." Maybe we could go "Jaws 6: Son of Jaws."
Oh, and I've gotta share a movie quote from a campy, funny movie I saw this weekend.
RANDOM MOVIE QUOTE!!
Senator Abercrombie's Wife: "I just don't know why every time a rich white man is against immigrants he's labled a racist."
- "A Day Without A Mexican" (2004)
I'm finished,
Nate
Thursday, March 10, 2005
In the criminal justice system...
So the T Puppy and I were talking last night about colleges and scholarships. Do you remember as a senior in high school how many scholarships colleges were handing out? Do you also remember how many of those scholarships apply to the first year only? Just like crack dealers. "Here you go, man. The first semester is almost free, but we offer no more scholarships for the next three years! HaHaHaHa!" I haven't seen a more ruthless dealer since Mr. Big on the arcade game N.A.R.C. Yes, I am fully aware that there are scholarships out there, I'm just saying there is a bigger pie available for the freshman than the sophomore.
Isn't it about time to thank Law and Order for what they've done for TV. Seriously, shouldn't we send them a card? Something? Check the roster: L&O, L&O: Special Victims Unit, L&O: Criminal Intent, L&O: Crime and Punishment, and the brand spanking new L&O: Trial By Jury. Wait, in my mind L&O: Crime and Punishment (L&O meets reality TV with excruciating results) never existed. I refuse to believe it existed. It think Law & Order should never go off the air. The one constant on that show is that the cast changes. Why can't it just carry on with a revolving cast forever? You could say that the shows with the late, great Jerry Orbach were the best (and I do), but are they really that much better than the seasons with Paul Sorvino? This is a franchise that picked Ice T for a role as a cop. Think about it, that's Ice T, who once wrote a songs called "Cop Killer" and "Smoked Pork." But, they made it work. They fired their assistant DA this year and as she's getting fired she drops that she is a lesbian completely out of the blue... with no further explanation. Loved it (mostly because she was a whiny bleeding heart on the show.) Heck, I suggest we even have International Law & Order Day. Why not? We've already got an International Women's Day...
I'm going to go straight to hell for this next part. Tuomas Tarkki was the best goalie in the CCHA this year, absolutely. If Jordan Sigalet (who has M.S.) or Alvareo Montoyeo (who is the GREATEST NHL prospect in HISTORY!) makes the All-CCHA team ahead of Tuomas, we need to rename the whole thing the "First and Second Unfairly Skewed Teams." Let us not forget how K-Wal got jobbed last year for second team and first team. Alvaro gets first team because he played on a great team with the most NHL prospects in the CCHA. Sigalet had worse numbers than Craig (slightly) but it was on a team that sucked, therefore justifying the selection...I guess. The selection seems like a no-brainer, but mark my words, there's still a possibility that Tuomas gets the shaft. If Jordan Sigalet gets the sympathy vote because he has M.S., the world of a Wildcat hockey fan is truly unfair. The only thing the "no peanut butter eating Finn" has going against him is that he didn't start as many games because we have a good freshman waiting in the wings who needs to get experience now to carry over to next year. Well, it's a big weekend for the Kitties and hopefully we can sweep out the Broncos on Friday and Saturday and make another appearance at the Joe and hopefully lock up a Frozen Four tourney invite.
(This is the part of the program where Grant usually starts yelling, "They've got no chance! They have to win the tournament to get in, that's the only way!" For a guy who loves his Wildcats, he hates talking about NMU's chances to make the NCAA's. I think it actually causes him physical pain. I still believe, though.)
I'm finished,
Nate
Isn't it about time to thank Law and Order for what they've done for TV. Seriously, shouldn't we send them a card? Something? Check the roster: L&O, L&O: Special Victims Unit, L&O: Criminal Intent, L&O: Crime and Punishment, and the brand spanking new L&O: Trial By Jury. Wait, in my mind L&O: Crime and Punishment (L&O meets reality TV with excruciating results) never existed. I refuse to believe it existed. It think Law & Order should never go off the air. The one constant on that show is that the cast changes. Why can't it just carry on with a revolving cast forever? You could say that the shows with the late, great Jerry Orbach were the best (and I do), but are they really that much better than the seasons with Paul Sorvino? This is a franchise that picked Ice T for a role as a cop. Think about it, that's Ice T, who once wrote a songs called "Cop Killer" and "Smoked Pork." But, they made it work. They fired their assistant DA this year and as she's getting fired she drops that she is a lesbian completely out of the blue... with no further explanation. Loved it (mostly because she was a whiny bleeding heart on the show.) Heck, I suggest we even have International Law & Order Day. Why not? We've already got an International Women's Day...
I'm going to go straight to hell for this next part. Tuomas Tarkki was the best goalie in the CCHA this year, absolutely. If Jordan Sigalet (who has M.S.) or Alvareo Montoyeo (who is the GREATEST NHL prospect in HISTORY!) makes the All-CCHA team ahead of Tuomas, we need to rename the whole thing the "First and Second Unfairly Skewed Teams." Let us not forget how K-Wal got jobbed last year for second team and first team. Alvaro gets first team because he played on a great team with the most NHL prospects in the CCHA. Sigalet had worse numbers than Craig (slightly) but it was on a team that sucked, therefore justifying the selection...I guess. The selection seems like a no-brainer, but mark my words, there's still a possibility that Tuomas gets the shaft. If Jordan Sigalet gets the sympathy vote because he has M.S., the world of a Wildcat hockey fan is truly unfair. The only thing the "no peanut butter eating Finn" has going against him is that he didn't start as many games because we have a good freshman waiting in the wings who needs to get experience now to carry over to next year. Well, it's a big weekend for the Kitties and hopefully we can sweep out the Broncos on Friday and Saturday and make another appearance at the Joe and hopefully lock up a Frozen Four tourney invite.
(This is the part of the program where Grant usually starts yelling, "They've got no chance! They have to win the tournament to get in, that's the only way!" For a guy who loves his Wildcats, he hates talking about NMU's chances to make the NCAA's. I think it actually causes him physical pain. I still believe, though.)
I'm finished,
Nate
Monday, March 07, 2005
The return.
Wow, if keeping a blog updated was a job in the military, this guy would be guilty of dereliction of duty. Seriously, Jack Nicholson would be ordering a Code Red for me right about now ("You can't HANDLE the truth!") I apologize, I know how may of you rely on my random witticisms and the like. OK, that's like none of you, but still.
Really, not a lot has gone on since I last posted. Other than the fact that the guy who played Bunz in "Booty Call" won an Oscar for best actor. It's fun to look back at every big name actor and realize that there was a time when they would do movies like "Booty Call." Speaking of Booty Call, an extensive look at movies with a predominantly African American cast shows that Vivica A. Fox and/or Nia Long is in approximately 79% of them. Just thought you should know.
I watched the last 20 minutes of "Devil's Advocate" last night for like the 50th time. There are some movies that I just can't leave alone. So for my entertainment, I am going to list the top 5 movies that I absolutely cannot skip over if I am channel surfing (Note: I do not include abominations like Goodfellas on network TV, as the edited for TV dialogue makes me want to... well, let's just say that I'd rather go buy a home colonscopy kit.)
1) Shawshank Redemption - This movie was on last week, I caught it at the beginning (right after Andy goes to prison), I had a ton of stuff to do, so what did I do? Yep. Watched the whole thing. Love that movie.
2) Out of Sight - Quite possibly the most underrated movie of all time. Ahhh, J.Lo when she could still act. J.Lo before she was doing duets with Ja Rule. Come to think of it, J.Lo before she was J.Lo, those were the days. 3) Devil's Advocate - Every time someone is making fun of the loud way Al Pacino talks: That is him at the end of this movie. My favorite Keanu movie not called "Matrix." It's got a message and the potentially horrifying scene at the end where Pacino wants Neo to have sex with his sister. Yikes. But, if you had seen his sister...
4) Bad Boys - You knew that was coming.
Sorry it's only four, but it is quittin time.
I'm finished,
Nate
Really, not a lot has gone on since I last posted. Other than the fact that the guy who played Bunz in "Booty Call" won an Oscar for best actor. It's fun to look back at every big name actor and realize that there was a time when they would do movies like "Booty Call." Speaking of Booty Call, an extensive look at movies with a predominantly African American cast shows that Vivica A. Fox and/or Nia Long is in approximately 79% of them. Just thought you should know.
I watched the last 20 minutes of "Devil's Advocate" last night for like the 50th time. There are some movies that I just can't leave alone. So for my entertainment, I am going to list the top 5 movies that I absolutely cannot skip over if I am channel surfing (Note: I do not include abominations like Goodfellas on network TV, as the edited for TV dialogue makes me want to... well, let's just say that I'd rather go buy a home colonscopy kit.)
1) Shawshank Redemption - This movie was on last week, I caught it at the beginning (right after Andy goes to prison), I had a ton of stuff to do, so what did I do? Yep. Watched the whole thing. Love that movie.
2) Out of Sight - Quite possibly the most underrated movie of all time. Ahhh, J.Lo when she could still act. J.Lo before she was doing duets with Ja Rule. Come to think of it, J.Lo before she was J.Lo, those were the days. 3) Devil's Advocate - Every time someone is making fun of the loud way Al Pacino talks: That is him at the end of this movie. My favorite Keanu movie not called "Matrix." It's got a message and the potentially horrifying scene at the end where Pacino wants Neo to have sex with his sister. Yikes. But, if you had seen his sister...
4) Bad Boys - You knew that was coming.
Sorry it's only four, but it is quittin time.
I'm finished,
Nate
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Keep 'em coming.
First, I need to start out this post by taking a moment to mention Hunter S. Thompson, who died over the weekend. His book and then subsequent movie "Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas" gave me a famous catch phrase which I still quote to this day, " Wait! We can't stop here... this is bat country!" Yeah, that sounds stupid but hey, I'm all about the phrases.
The phrase that encapsulated this last weekend was:
"Need a beer?"
"Yeah, keep 'em coming. You don't even have to ask."
NASCAR, Tiger Woods on PS2, Outback Steakhouse, lots of beer and Hooters all contributed to the weekend being a break from the monotony that we all needed. As Kurt put it, "This was just what the doctor ordered." Just really relaxing. In our worlds of loan payments and mandatory overtime, it's good to know that we can still kick back and be our old selves over a game of PS2 or a sports debate at the bar. Also, I found out this weekend that I am standing in a wedding as co-best man. This will be my first and possibly only appearance in a wedding party. So, that'll be fun.
Did something this weekend that I haven't done in a long time. I waited more than 20 minutes to get a restaurant seat at Outback Steakhouse on Saturday night. Usually when I walk into a restaurant and the "clipboard-holder-with-the-lighty-up-thingies" tells us it will be more than 15 minutes, I'm usually the one saying, "Screw it, let's go home and order pizza." This time it was 60-70 minutes. I almost swallowed my tongue. We found out later that there was some formal dance going on in the Appleton area that night and the whole joint was populated by high school girls who spent way too much on dresses and guys who looked uncomfortable as hell wearing a shirt with a tie. That's where the greatest invention in restaurant waiting technology comes in handy: the restaurant bar. Nothing hits the spot more than a place where you can shag $3.50 bottles of beer while you wait forever for a table.
Ashley and I also made a decision on a vacation in May. We decided on Seattle over Boston because of the close proximity of friends Beej and Kate in the Seattle area. We can get there and back for something like $500 in airfare. I always thought flying cost somewhere in the ballpark of about a kajillion dollars. We also found that it is cheaper to fly to Seattle than it is to Boston for obvious reasons. No, wait. Boston is closer! That doesn't make sense. The one flight we are looking at has 1 stop. Now get your U.S. map out and take a gander at this flight schedule: Milwaukee to Seattle, with a stop in Atlanta. Yes, the Atlanta in Georgia. That's like saying I've got to drive from Marquette to Escanaba...but I have to go through Munising first.
I'm finished,
Nate
The phrase that encapsulated this last weekend was:
"Need a beer?"
"Yeah, keep 'em coming. You don't even have to ask."
NASCAR, Tiger Woods on PS2, Outback Steakhouse, lots of beer and Hooters all contributed to the weekend being a break from the monotony that we all needed. As Kurt put it, "This was just what the doctor ordered." Just really relaxing. In our worlds of loan payments and mandatory overtime, it's good to know that we can still kick back and be our old selves over a game of PS2 or a sports debate at the bar. Also, I found out this weekend that I am standing in a wedding as co-best man. This will be my first and possibly only appearance in a wedding party. So, that'll be fun.
Did something this weekend that I haven't done in a long time. I waited more than 20 minutes to get a restaurant seat at Outback Steakhouse on Saturday night. Usually when I walk into a restaurant and the "clipboard-holder-with-the-lighty-up-thingies" tells us it will be more than 15 minutes, I'm usually the one saying, "Screw it, let's go home and order pizza." This time it was 60-70 minutes. I almost swallowed my tongue. We found out later that there was some formal dance going on in the Appleton area that night and the whole joint was populated by high school girls who spent way too much on dresses and guys who looked uncomfortable as hell wearing a shirt with a tie. That's where the greatest invention in restaurant waiting technology comes in handy: the restaurant bar. Nothing hits the spot more than a place where you can shag $3.50 bottles of beer while you wait forever for a table.
Ashley and I also made a decision on a vacation in May. We decided on Seattle over Boston because of the close proximity of friends Beej and Kate in the Seattle area. We can get there and back for something like $500 in airfare. I always thought flying cost somewhere in the ballpark of about a kajillion dollars. We also found that it is cheaper to fly to Seattle than it is to Boston for obvious reasons. No, wait. Boston is closer! That doesn't make sense. The one flight we are looking at has 1 stop. Now get your U.S. map out and take a gander at this flight schedule: Milwaukee to Seattle, with a stop in Atlanta. Yes, the Atlanta in Georgia. That's like saying I've got to drive from Marquette to Escanaba...but I have to go through Munising first.
I'm finished,
Nate
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Gentlemen, start your engines.
Yeee Haw! The Great American Race is back and miraculously, there will be a 2005 edition of the "Nate and Grant Daytona Day." Hopefully making his third appearance at the Great American Party will be Kurt (he's got an ailing great grandma right now, Hoss wishes all the best.) For those that don't remember the legend of last year, I had drank a 12-pack before the race was over... at like two in the afternoon. This year I think the hard drinkin will be reserved for Saturday night and Sunday will have to be a sippin on a brewsky type of day (got that job and all that to go to Monday morning.) The irony is, this is one of the few weekends I look forward to every year... and I probably won't watch another race all season. I mean, I like NASCAR and all but if I watch too much I get the urge to chew tobacco and drop a tranny in a Chevelle. Nobody wins when Redneck Bizarro Nate is on the loose.
The real loser in all of this is my girlfriend, who has now had to endure the MLB playoffs, a whole NFL season, now NASCAR, and it is only a few weeks until NCAA Basketball and Hockey tournaments. The point, as always: I am a horrible boyfriend. She's probably looking online right now for ways to work strychnine into my diet. She was quoted the other day saying that she was happy that the NHL season is going to be cancelled. Doesn't that sounds like a person with no soul? And yes, she does read this page. I'm so dead.
ALERT! My last mention of football until draft season! (Which starts in about 2 weeks.) I guess it is a fact: Everybody dislikes the Patriots. They are the new Dallas Cowboys, except for the scandals with the drugs and the prostitutes. People have this overwhelming disdain for teams that win consistently. Dallas, San Fransisco, the Lakers, Red Wings, the Vikings... wait, strike that last one. In response to Jaime's plea for me to pull for the Vikings...um, not a chance. Three reasons: a) ugly colors 2) Dante Culpepper bores me d) ugly colors. If the Patriots had a press conference tomorrow stating, "We officially change our colors to violet and gold!" I think I'd be on WDUZ 107.5 with Bill, Kurt and The Rookie callin in about "With the same Packer team as last year and a new coaching staff...WE'LL go 13-3 next year... maybe 14-2. It could happen!" OK. That wouldn't happen, I could never be a Packer fan. Or could I?
One great quote from the post Super Bowl stuff:
Talking about the comparison between Tom Brady and Peyton Manning:
"Tom Brady played three playoff games against teams with a combined 45-8 record... and finished with five TD passes and zero interceptions. According to my math, he's also 9-0 in playoff games, although he has never thrown for 49 touchdowns in a regular season. So there's still some work left." -Bill Simmons
Also, Valentine's Day went well. I got probably the single best present (birthday, Christmas or otherwise) I got a new Playstation 2! A small, thin little half a pound of PS2 goodness! All my games work! It rules. Gotta go.
RANDOM TV QUOTE!
Michael Bluth: "Tobias, I want you to get a tape recorder and record your conversations throughout the day. You'd be surprised at some of the phrases you use."
- Arrested Development
I'm finished,
Nate
The real loser in all of this is my girlfriend, who has now had to endure the MLB playoffs, a whole NFL season, now NASCAR, and it is only a few weeks until NCAA Basketball and Hockey tournaments. The point, as always: I am a horrible boyfriend. She's probably looking online right now for ways to work strychnine into my diet. She was quoted the other day saying that she was happy that the NHL season is going to be cancelled. Doesn't that sounds like a person with no soul? And yes, she does read this page. I'm so dead.
ALERT! My last mention of football until draft season! (Which starts in about 2 weeks.) I guess it is a fact: Everybody dislikes the Patriots. They are the new Dallas Cowboys, except for the scandals with the drugs and the prostitutes. People have this overwhelming disdain for teams that win consistently. Dallas, San Fransisco, the Lakers, Red Wings, the Vikings... wait, strike that last one. In response to Jaime's plea for me to pull for the Vikings...um, not a chance. Three reasons: a) ugly colors 2) Dante Culpepper bores me d) ugly colors. If the Patriots had a press conference tomorrow stating, "We officially change our colors to violet and gold!" I think I'd be on WDUZ 107.5 with Bill, Kurt and The Rookie callin in about "With the same Packer team as last year and a new coaching staff...WE'LL go 13-3 next year... maybe 14-2. It could happen!" OK. That wouldn't happen, I could never be a Packer fan. Or could I?
One great quote from the post Super Bowl stuff:
Talking about the comparison between Tom Brady and Peyton Manning:
"Tom Brady played three playoff games against teams with a combined 45-8 record... and finished with five TD passes and zero interceptions. According to my math, he's also 9-0 in playoff games, although he has never thrown for 49 touchdowns in a regular season. So there's still some work left." -Bill Simmons
Also, Valentine's Day went well. I got probably the single best present (birthday, Christmas or otherwise) I got a new Playstation 2! A small, thin little half a pound of PS2 goodness! All my games work! It rules. Gotta go.
RANDOM TV QUOTE!
Michael Bluth: "Tobias, I want you to get a tape recorder and record your conversations throughout the day. You'd be surprised at some of the phrases you use."
- Arrested Development
I'm finished,
Nate
Monday, February 07, 2005
How do you spell DYNASTY?
Another year, another title. When I look back on the things that have worked out the best for me in the long run, one of those things has got to be becoming a Pats fan back in 1996. I had many years to think about what it would be like if the Pats ever won a Super Bowl. I never ever expected that I would be sitting here less than a decade later pondering a third world championship. I think I've proved one thing through all of this:
"Teams that I root for become champions."
Look at my resume: The Red Sox have won the world series, Patriots have won 3 Super Bowls since 2001, I've seen Northern win a hockey national championship, and the Avalanche have won 2 Stanley Cups (my boy Patrick Roy has 3 since I became a hockey fan.) To a lesser degree (because I am more a fan of the sports themselves rather than any one team) I've seen the Pistons win an NBA title and Michigan win a college football national championship. Not a bad life.
This is the first Super Bowl I can remember that I have not been at a gathering of friends to watch it. Ashley and I took in the pizza and wings buffet at The Bar on Lynndale (which was awesome), but there just seems to be something missing when you don't have your boys around. I did recieve several calls from Marquette, Hoguhton, Rapid River and Seattle immediately after the game was over with well wishes. That was pretty cool.
Three huge disappointments from the weekend: The Super Bowl Commercials, Super Bowl halftime show and Saturday's SNL with Paris Hilton hosting. The commercials were just plain uninspired, they got Paul McCartney for the halftime show (which was an excellent choice...in 1975) and Paris showed once again that she is absolutely devoid of any acting skill that doesn't include amateur porn. This episode of SNL is perhaps the worst one in the history of the franchise. The musical guest was Keane. Yeah, I've never heard of them either.
I'm finished,
Nate
"Teams that I root for become champions."
Look at my resume: The Red Sox have won the world series, Patriots have won 3 Super Bowls since 2001, I've seen Northern win a hockey national championship, and the Avalanche have won 2 Stanley Cups (my boy Patrick Roy has 3 since I became a hockey fan.) To a lesser degree (because I am more a fan of the sports themselves rather than any one team) I've seen the Pistons win an NBA title and Michigan win a college football national championship. Not a bad life.
This is the first Super Bowl I can remember that I have not been at a gathering of friends to watch it. Ashley and I took in the pizza and wings buffet at The Bar on Lynndale (which was awesome), but there just seems to be something missing when you don't have your boys around. I did recieve several calls from Marquette, Hoguhton, Rapid River and Seattle immediately after the game was over with well wishes. That was pretty cool.
Three huge disappointments from the weekend: The Super Bowl Commercials, Super Bowl halftime show and Saturday's SNL with Paris Hilton hosting. The commercials were just plain uninspired, they got Paul McCartney for the halftime show (which was an excellent choice...in 1975) and Paris showed once again that she is absolutely devoid of any acting skill that doesn't include amateur porn. This episode of SNL is perhaps the worst one in the history of the franchise. The musical guest was Keane. Yeah, I've never heard of them either.
I'm finished,
Nate
Friday, February 04, 2005
The Crue is back...and they brought The Doctor!
Doesn't it seem that the more we progress on this crazy timeline the more we yearn for days gone by? Last night I purchased Red, White and Crue, the Greatest Hits/New Album of hair band superstars Motley Crue. It is one rad compact disc, let me tell you what. Sometimes we forget what made hair bands great: big guitars, big drums, a minimum of one guitar solo per song, and of course the occasional obligatory ballad for the slow dancin'. Just look at the list: "Girls, Girls, Girls", "Kickstart my Heart", "Home Sweet Home", "Dr. Feelgood", and my personal favorite "Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)."
The Crue and Guns and Roses singlehandedly created the rock star persona of the 80's, full of booze, women, inner squabbling and drugs. Lots of drugs. I mean, Nikki Sixx was declared legally dead at one point. When someone claims to "Party like a rock star" think of Nikki Sixx. Now that guy partied like a rock star. All of this brought me back to my elementary school days when times were simpler: no jobs, no bills, no fear of terrorism, etc...
What I want is a new band to emerge and bring the hair band back. Not neccessarily the actual hair, but the music. There were some new songs on the album from the Crue but they are kinda bland except for "If I Die Tomorrow." So, who's with me? Who wants MTV to do a show called "Making the Hair Band?" Who!?!? I know my boy Kurt in the UP is with me. Kurt was talking some noise earlier in the year about hitting up the "Red, White and Crue Tour" when it comes to Milwaukee. With all four original Crue members together, that's going to be hard to pass up.
Was I right about the Super Hype on T.O.? As Rodney Harrison said, "I hope he does play. I hope he's 100%. I don't want any excuses on either side." So at least two doctors have now come out and said that a hit below T.O.'s knee could end his career. Not the kind of odds I like. Can you imagine being the guy that ends Terrell Owens's career? He could be making a legal tackle and still blow up that pieced together lower leg. People would be freaking out the next day: "Bruschi maliciously snaps T.O.'s leg off!" OK, I'm done with the T.O. thing. Patriots by four. T.O. has B.O. Seriously, I'm done now. Go Pats!
I'm finished,
Nate
The Crue and Guns and Roses singlehandedly created the rock star persona of the 80's, full of booze, women, inner squabbling and drugs. Lots of drugs. I mean, Nikki Sixx was declared legally dead at one point. When someone claims to "Party like a rock star" think of Nikki Sixx. Now that guy partied like a rock star. All of this brought me back to my elementary school days when times were simpler: no jobs, no bills, no fear of terrorism, etc...
What I want is a new band to emerge and bring the hair band back. Not neccessarily the actual hair, but the music. There were some new songs on the album from the Crue but they are kinda bland except for "If I Die Tomorrow." So, who's with me? Who wants MTV to do a show called "Making the Hair Band?" Who!?!? I know my boy Kurt in the UP is with me. Kurt was talking some noise earlier in the year about hitting up the "Red, White and Crue Tour" when it comes to Milwaukee. With all four original Crue members together, that's going to be hard to pass up.
Was I right about the Super Hype on T.O.? As Rodney Harrison said, "I hope he does play. I hope he's 100%. I don't want any excuses on either side." So at least two doctors have now come out and said that a hit below T.O.'s knee could end his career. Not the kind of odds I like. Can you imagine being the guy that ends Terrell Owens's career? He could be making a legal tackle and still blow up that pieced together lower leg. People would be freaking out the next day: "Bruschi maliciously snaps T.O.'s leg off!" OK, I'm done with the T.O. thing. Patriots by four. T.O. has B.O. Seriously, I'm done now. Go Pats!
I'm finished,
Nate
Monday, January 31, 2005
Ashlee-ve her alone?
Still in a relative daze after realizing that there was no football this Sunday, I found myself watching the premiere of the Ashlee Simpson show. Suddenly I realized that this episode was going to cover the incident on SNL where her "acid reflux made her lip sync." This is going to be great! It's like they made a bonus DVD of that SNL episode and now we get to watch the behind the scenes featurette! So, for half the episode we have to watch her and her friends hang out and say things such as, "SNL is like so like it's a cultural...like all the great singers go through it, you know."
(And, you know that maybe one out of these three girls even has a clue who Dennis Miller is or that Adam Sandler at one time did show that he has real comedic talent on SNL and they are going to comment on the historical significance?)
Then, it's SNL showtime... uh-oh... she's getting raspy... oh my lord, it's...it's... acid reflux! End of show. NOOOOOOO!!!! I want to see it again, in all of its behind the scenes glory! At least we get to see previews of Wednesday's show and Ashlee says this:
"The day after, I knew it would be a big deal, but it was on like the front page! It's not fair, you can't define someone's career by one moment..."
Excuse me, but have you SEEN the Milli Vanilli episode of Behind the Music AND the True Hollywood Story!?!? Define a career? Milli killed himself because lip syncing ruined his life so badly! I probably shouldn't take as much pleasure in skewering the Simpson kid, but I think in many ways she's the marginal talent that gets the pub when maybe another better singer doesn't. It isn't fair, but that's the way it is. Besides, she did get booed by 65,000 strong at the Orange Bowl for her awful rendition of "Pieces of Prilosec" (you've gotta love that acid reflux humor!) I guess you could say she's suffered enough. Nah, probably not.
I'm finished,
Nate
(And, you know that maybe one out of these three girls even has a clue who Dennis Miller is or that Adam Sandler at one time did show that he has real comedic talent on SNL and they are going to comment on the historical significance?)
Then, it's SNL showtime... uh-oh... she's getting raspy... oh my lord, it's...it's... acid reflux! End of show. NOOOOOOO!!!! I want to see it again, in all of its behind the scenes glory! At least we get to see previews of Wednesday's show and Ashlee says this:
"The day after, I knew it would be a big deal, but it was on like the front page! It's not fair, you can't define someone's career by one moment..."
Excuse me, but have you SEEN the Milli Vanilli episode of Behind the Music AND the True Hollywood Story!?!? Define a career? Milli killed himself because lip syncing ruined his life so badly! I probably shouldn't take as much pleasure in skewering the Simpson kid, but I think in many ways she's the marginal talent that gets the pub when maybe another better singer doesn't. It isn't fair, but that's the way it is. Besides, she did get booed by 65,000 strong at the Orange Bowl for her awful rendition of "Pieces of Prilosec" (you've gotta love that acid reflux humor!) I guess you could say she's suffered enough. Nah, probably not.
I'm finished,
Nate
Wednesday, January 26, 2005
Nate and Copp's: Round 2
Nate and Copp's Foods are still speaking to each other, but we are definately fighting again. I go to get some groceries and some beer last night after Scrubs is done at 8:30p. Of course the law is that nobody is allowed to buy booze after 9p. I grab my few things and I hear over the intercom, "We will stop selling alcohol in five minutes." OK, so I run my beer up to the checkout and the guy gets all frantic to the point that he processes the beer as a seperate transaction to get it in under the wire. Whew, 10 seconds to spare. You would've thought it was the last five minutes of an episode of '24.' Then, the kid running the register says this: "I don't know why people always wait until the last minute to buy alcohol. Maybe it isn't as exciting to buy it at noon."
Oh, no. He. Did. Not!
Not to sound like an alcoholic wife beater or anything, but I WORK ALL DAY! Ten hours, punk! Then I go in on my day off! I am not blessed with the schedule that would allow me to buy booze at noon! This is, of course my second run in with Copp's Foods in the last year. I follow your stupid rules of buying before 9pm and I still get hassled? Are you joking! So, suck it and ring up my second transaction, register jockey, I am officially out of here. Later much!
As I predicted last year around this time, I would be watching the Super Bowl again in 2005 with a keen interest in the outcome. The Patriots are going to their third Super Bowl in four seasons in two weeks and if people are smart, they will not pick against them. The best part is that they play the Eagles. Now, I know they are probably the worst team we match up with. They like to throw the ball and even without T.O., they are pretty darned good and that's a concern when New England's dime back Hank Poteat was out of football and taking college classes when he was signed two weeks ago. We are much better suited to stop the run than the pass. BUT! We will get to hear about Terrell Owens for two weeks solid, adding to the distraction for the Eagles. Sure Belichek and Brady are undefeated in posteseason play with the Pats, sure the Patriots just silenced all of the "This time will be different against the Colts/Steelers crowd", but all the talk will be about T.O. and will he be back (and if he is, does he have any special Super Bowl dances, and does he plan on doing a pregame skit with Nicolette Sheridan?) That's the thing about T.O. for as good as he is (and he is really good) he often creates unwanted distraction. Is this Eagles team any better without him than the teams that lost the last three NFC championships? Not a chance, and T.O. creates a distraction whether he plays or not. I think the Pats have got to be smiling, they don't have the characters or the loud talkers like T.O., Freddie Mitchell, Brian Dawkins, but they have a hard time hearing them anyways- what with those Super Bowl rings in their ears.
I'm finished,
Nate
Oh, no. He. Did. Not!
Not to sound like an alcoholic wife beater or anything, but I WORK ALL DAY! Ten hours, punk! Then I go in on my day off! I am not blessed with the schedule that would allow me to buy booze at noon! This is, of course my second run in with Copp's Foods in the last year. I follow your stupid rules of buying before 9pm and I still get hassled? Are you joking! So, suck it and ring up my second transaction, register jockey, I am officially out of here. Later much!
As I predicted last year around this time, I would be watching the Super Bowl again in 2005 with a keen interest in the outcome. The Patriots are going to their third Super Bowl in four seasons in two weeks and if people are smart, they will not pick against them. The best part is that they play the Eagles. Now, I know they are probably the worst team we match up with. They like to throw the ball and even without T.O., they are pretty darned good and that's a concern when New England's dime back Hank Poteat was out of football and taking college classes when he was signed two weeks ago. We are much better suited to stop the run than the pass. BUT! We will get to hear about Terrell Owens for two weeks solid, adding to the distraction for the Eagles. Sure Belichek and Brady are undefeated in posteseason play with the Pats, sure the Patriots just silenced all of the "This time will be different against the Colts/Steelers crowd", but all the talk will be about T.O. and will he be back (and if he is, does he have any special Super Bowl dances, and does he plan on doing a pregame skit with Nicolette Sheridan?) That's the thing about T.O. for as good as he is (and he is really good) he often creates unwanted distraction. Is this Eagles team any better without him than the teams that lost the last three NFC championships? Not a chance, and T.O. creates a distraction whether he plays or not. I think the Pats have got to be smiling, they don't have the characters or the loud talkers like T.O., Freddie Mitchell, Brian Dawkins, but they have a hard time hearing them anyways- what with those Super Bowl rings in their ears.
I'm finished,
Nate
Friday, January 21, 2005
"Wake up, Da Brat! Wake Up!"
The title of this post is actually a quote from the 4th installment of the Surreal Life. It was exclaimed by Chyna (who now goes by Joni Fifteenminutes or something) who used to be a wrestler and former Intercontinental Champion of the WWE. She's running around in the middle of the night in a bikini and trying to wake up Da Brat, female rap artist and possible waitress. "Da Brat! Wake up!" I love it. It's going to be my new catchphrase. This is now my second post that included surreal life references. I'm not sure that is a good thing. In case you weren't paying attention as closely as me (and few are) the Surreal Life now has a spinoff called "Strange Love" starring budding love between Flava Flav and Bridgette Nielsen. That is a show that could have easily been called "Most Contrived Publicity Stunt Ever." Can you imagine the previews? "Next time on Most Contrived...tempers flare when Flava's best clock necklace is smashed when Bridgette passes out on top of it. Yeaaaahhh boyeeee!"
Speaking of Chyna, she left WWE to pursue an acting career. Has that ever worked? Hulk Hogan did some "movies," including classics like Suburban Commando and Mr. Nanny, but then again they let Shaq star in his own movies too. Let's put it this way, wrestlers are similar to adult film stars: They are kind of like actors like Spam is kind of like lunch meat. They have some of the same characteristics but they are not one in the same. The possible exception is The Rock, who knows that he can get the Vin Diesel-esque roles and is thriving in that so far. Also, the producers of Blade: Trinity expanded the part that they had for wrestler Triple H because he was so good. For the most part, when a wrestler contemplates acting don't they ever think, "I know how this story ends! I end up on the Surreal Life! Yelling things like, 'Get up, Da Brat!'"
Appleton is trying to push through an ballot measure to (and this makes me sick) ban smoking in bars that are in the city limits. What? America is about freedom! Like the freedom to inhale the nicotine filled air of a local dive bar without government interference! Don't tell me where I can and can't inhale second and first hand smoke, G-man! The revolution will not be televised and the government had better stay out of my uterus!!!
That got away from me. Sorry.
But seriously, no smoking in bars? If you don't like the smoke, don't go to bars. If you still like the bar got to one of those bars that chose to be smoke free. If that isn't an option, there is probably a reason: No bar owner would be that stupid and want to lose business. So, seen as the market and the free will of the people won't fix the problem...let's pass an ordinance! Yeah! I know there are always two sides to an issue, but if there really is a need for smoke free bars, the market would create them. If people really value their health more than going to a bar, they wouldn't go. It's all about economics. The validity of the petition that is circulating is in question anyways. Some petitions were left in health clubs and other place that healthy pink lungers congregate, which is a no-no in Wisconsin. The explanation from the Free Air Coaliton (or whatever they are called?) "The locations were more like a collection point...Yeah...and the petitions that were actually signed at the health clubs got lost, see... yeah, that's what happened." That's all I've got for today.
I'm gearing up for a big day of women's hoops tomorrow, going to see the UWGB Lady Phoenix in action against Detroit. The big showdown in hockey is set for next weekend with the Kitties from Marquette City travelling to Ann Arbor to take on top 5 ranked Michigan on Fox Sports Net. Apparently there is a get together for Northern alums in the area at a local sports bar in Appleton that I will probably attend. A word of caution to my buddy Brown Cow in the A-Duece, we almost always play well at Yost. Of course we have a great road record this year...for me to poop on. Have a great weekend all!
I'm finished,
Nate
Speaking of Chyna, she left WWE to pursue an acting career. Has that ever worked? Hulk Hogan did some "movies," including classics like Suburban Commando and Mr. Nanny, but then again they let Shaq star in his own movies too. Let's put it this way, wrestlers are similar to adult film stars: They are kind of like actors like Spam is kind of like lunch meat. They have some of the same characteristics but they are not one in the same. The possible exception is The Rock, who knows that he can get the Vin Diesel-esque roles and is thriving in that so far. Also, the producers of Blade: Trinity expanded the part that they had for wrestler Triple H because he was so good. For the most part, when a wrestler contemplates acting don't they ever think, "I know how this story ends! I end up on the Surreal Life! Yelling things like, 'Get up, Da Brat!'"
Appleton is trying to push through an ballot measure to (and this makes me sick) ban smoking in bars that are in the city limits. What? America is about freedom! Like the freedom to inhale the nicotine filled air of a local dive bar without government interference! Don't tell me where I can and can't inhale second and first hand smoke, G-man! The revolution will not be televised and the government had better stay out of my uterus!!!
That got away from me. Sorry.
But seriously, no smoking in bars? If you don't like the smoke, don't go to bars. If you still like the bar got to one of those bars that chose to be smoke free. If that isn't an option, there is probably a reason: No bar owner would be that stupid and want to lose business. So, seen as the market and the free will of the people won't fix the problem...let's pass an ordinance! Yeah! I know there are always two sides to an issue, but if there really is a need for smoke free bars, the market would create them. If people really value their health more than going to a bar, they wouldn't go. It's all about economics. The validity of the petition that is circulating is in question anyways. Some petitions were left in health clubs and other place that healthy pink lungers congregate, which is a no-no in Wisconsin. The explanation from the Free Air Coaliton (or whatever they are called?) "The locations were more like a collection point...Yeah...and the petitions that were actually signed at the health clubs got lost, see... yeah, that's what happened." That's all I've got for today.
I'm gearing up for a big day of women's hoops tomorrow, going to see the UWGB Lady Phoenix in action against Detroit. The big showdown in hockey is set for next weekend with the Kitties from Marquette City travelling to Ann Arbor to take on top 5 ranked Michigan on Fox Sports Net. Apparently there is a get together for Northern alums in the area at a local sports bar in Appleton that I will probably attend. A word of caution to my buddy Brown Cow in the A-Duece, we almost always play well at Yost. Of course we have a great road record this year...for me to poop on. Have a great weekend all!
I'm finished,
Nate
Monday, January 17, 2005
Paper champs.
As most of you probably saw over the weekend, the Pats spanked the snot out of the "best offense in history." Peyton Manning (the best quarterback to never win anything of importance ever) looked absolutely lost even though our third best cornerback who was covering a 1000+ yard reciever is a converted WR himself. My favorite story was listening to the pregame when Phil Simms declared that despite the weather, Peyton would be fine because he still "had good control of the ball last year when the weather was bad." Sure he did...even though he threw 4 picks.
I didn't get to watch any of the Golden Globes last night, but it looks like what I've been saying for years still holds true: Cable is where it's at. Get this, THREE of the five nominees for outstanding drama series were from the FX network (The Sheild. Rescue Me, and the winner Nip/Tuck.) I'm not sure why I didn't see if anyone would put money against Teri Hatcher winning a globe for best actress in a comedy which may have been the easiest prognostication for an award since Ricky Williams won the Heisman trophy. In that category she was going against the other two actresses from the show. How would you like to be a lead actress who didn't get nominated in that category when they nominate 3 actresses from the same show? That'd get my knickers in a twist a little bit.
Most dangerous job in the world? CEO of McDonald's. Less than a year after their previous chairman dies (ironically) of a heart attack, their new CEO succumbs to cancer...at 44 years old. You want to poison the youth of America, you gotta pay karma's check. Jared has as of yet not choked to death on a Subway sweet onion teriyaki, but you just know it's coming. I've been sticking to Jimmy John's and Herbs & Gerbs for my sandwich needs lately, but if anyone knows where there is a D&M / Togo's-esque sandwich shop in the A-town area lemme know.
Oh, and where are my manners? Happy MLK Day to all. There is no mail, banks are closed, the stock market is closed, the Federal Reserve is closed, our mutual fund processing agent is closed, nothing can get processed until tomorrow... and we still had to work today. I don't get it.
I'm finished,
Nate
I didn't get to watch any of the Golden Globes last night, but it looks like what I've been saying for years still holds true: Cable is where it's at. Get this, THREE of the five nominees for outstanding drama series were from the FX network (The Sheild. Rescue Me, and the winner Nip/Tuck.) I'm not sure why I didn't see if anyone would put money against Teri Hatcher winning a globe for best actress in a comedy which may have been the easiest prognostication for an award since Ricky Williams won the Heisman trophy. In that category she was going against the other two actresses from the show. How would you like to be a lead actress who didn't get nominated in that category when they nominate 3 actresses from the same show? That'd get my knickers in a twist a little bit.
Most dangerous job in the world? CEO of McDonald's. Less than a year after their previous chairman dies (ironically) of a heart attack, their new CEO succumbs to cancer...at 44 years old. You want to poison the youth of America, you gotta pay karma's check. Jared has as of yet not choked to death on a Subway sweet onion teriyaki, but you just know it's coming. I've been sticking to Jimmy John's and Herbs & Gerbs for my sandwich needs lately, but if anyone knows where there is a D&M / Togo's-esque sandwich shop in the A-town area lemme know.
Oh, and where are my manners? Happy MLK Day to all. There is no mail, banks are closed, the stock market is closed, the Federal Reserve is closed, our mutual fund processing agent is closed, nothing can get processed until tomorrow... and we still had to work today. I don't get it.
I'm finished,
Nate
Saturday, January 15, 2005
Chillin.
What region of the world do I live in that has temps in the lower to mid 30's on Monday and then -6 on Friday with -25 wind chills? I can now here things like this on the radio: "It's currently 29 deg in Appleton, 30 in Green Bay. For tomorrow highs around 3 above." I think I'm going to have one of those sudden temperature change heart attacks like you are supposed to have when you get out of the sauna and jump in a snow bank.
Not a lot going on this week. I was super busy at Thrivent Monday and Tuesday because people were finally getting their year end statements. Did you know that you can lose money when you invest in mutual funds and stocks? Because a majority of people I talk to seem to be flabbergasted by the concept. I have so many great stories that I can't put in writing, but ask me some time (preferably when I'm intoxicated) and I will tell you all about them.
Unfortunately my time is almost up here at the Appleton Public Library. Sorry for the short post today, I promise to try better! I should actually buck up and buy a computer for home, but I haven't for two reasons:
1) I have access to a computer at work 24/7 (which does have some sites blocked for "productivity" purposes. Whatever.)
2) I don't want to be like, "Wow it's 2:00am already! I should really get off the internet and go to bed...Oooohh! A list of all the movies Val Kilmer has ever been in? I better research each one! What's another hour?"
Yzma: Tell us where the talking llama is and we'll burn your house to the ground.
Kronk: Don't you mean "or"?
Yzma: [sighs] Tell us where the talking llama is *or* we'll burn your house to the ground.
Chaca: Well, which one is it? That seems like a pretty crucial conjunction.
-The Emperor's New Groove (2004)
I'm finished,
Nate
Not a lot going on this week. I was super busy at Thrivent Monday and Tuesday because people were finally getting their year end statements. Did you know that you can lose money when you invest in mutual funds and stocks? Because a majority of people I talk to seem to be flabbergasted by the concept. I have so many great stories that I can't put in writing, but ask me some time (preferably when I'm intoxicated) and I will tell you all about them.
Unfortunately my time is almost up here at the Appleton Public Library. Sorry for the short post today, I promise to try better! I should actually buck up and buy a computer for home, but I haven't for two reasons:
1) I have access to a computer at work 24/7 (which does have some sites blocked for "productivity" purposes. Whatever.)
2) I don't want to be like, "Wow it's 2:00am already! I should really get off the internet and go to bed...Oooohh! A list of all the movies Val Kilmer has ever been in? I better research each one! What's another hour?"
Yzma: Tell us where the talking llama is and we'll burn your house to the ground.
Kronk: Don't you mean "or"?
Yzma: [sighs] Tell us where the talking llama is *or* we'll burn your house to the ground.
Chaca: Well, which one is it? That seems like a pretty crucial conjunction.
-The Emperor's New Groove (2004)
I'm finished,
Nate
Monday, January 10, 2005
Nathan J Holtslander 1980-
"Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated." -Mark Twain
Friday night I am hanging out at The Bar on Lynndale celebrating with a colleauge who was moving on from Thrivent to bigger and better things. Upon a subsequent check of my cell phone log I found that 3 people had called me and I recieved a strange voice mail from Grant stating somberly, "Call me when you get this." My heart sank immediately. What could have happened? Is everything all right? Did the Red Wings lose? WHAT HAPPENED!?!?
I finally get Grant on the phone and he tells me this: "Kurt told me that he heard that you had killed yourself." Umm. What? Yes, apparently everyone in Rapid River had heard the same horrible rumor (So much so that a friend of the family visited my parents on Sunday night sobbing for their loss.) Obviously I am not deceased and am very much alive and well here in Appleton, WI. I thought little of it until I talked to my mother this morning when she told me, "Everybody knows about it. Everybody." Only now, three days later is it starting to piss me off. Friday night I had this exchange with my mother, "People heard I was dead." "Really? Well, good thing your not!" and we left it at that. Now I've got people crying because of the irresponsible or henious acts of somebody.
Then, that all led to this exchange with my ex-girlfriend Brooke, who most of you know, on Saturday:
B: "I guess you've heard by now."
N: "Yeah."
B: "I just want you to know that I didn't have anything to do with it."
N: "OK. Didn't say you did."
B: "Well, it's just that I don't even care about you enough to start something like that."
N: "Thanks. Real cheery."
B: "Well, I have no stress in my life now and I'm finally happy."
N: "I think we've already established that."
B: "OK."
N: "OK."
B: "Cheer up, don't sound so depressed."
Classy. Just your typical "Glad your not dead. Just reiterating my dislike for you." call. Nice.
So anyways, you can bask in the glow of my non-demise and hollah at me when you get a chance. Aight?
I'm finished,
Nate
Friday night I am hanging out at The Bar on Lynndale celebrating with a colleauge who was moving on from Thrivent to bigger and better things. Upon a subsequent check of my cell phone log I found that 3 people had called me and I recieved a strange voice mail from Grant stating somberly, "Call me when you get this." My heart sank immediately. What could have happened? Is everything all right? Did the Red Wings lose? WHAT HAPPENED!?!?
I finally get Grant on the phone and he tells me this: "Kurt told me that he heard that you had killed yourself." Umm. What? Yes, apparently everyone in Rapid River had heard the same horrible rumor (So much so that a friend of the family visited my parents on Sunday night sobbing for their loss.) Obviously I am not deceased and am very much alive and well here in Appleton, WI. I thought little of it until I talked to my mother this morning when she told me, "Everybody knows about it. Everybody." Only now, three days later is it starting to piss me off. Friday night I had this exchange with my mother, "People heard I was dead." "Really? Well, good thing your not!" and we left it at that. Now I've got people crying because of the irresponsible or henious acts of somebody.
Then, that all led to this exchange with my ex-girlfriend Brooke, who most of you know, on Saturday:
B: "I guess you've heard by now."
N: "Yeah."
B: "I just want you to know that I didn't have anything to do with it."
N: "OK. Didn't say you did."
B: "Well, it's just that I don't even care about you enough to start something like that."
N: "Thanks. Real cheery."
B: "Well, I have no stress in my life now and I'm finally happy."
N: "I think we've already established that."
B: "OK."
N: "OK."
B: "Cheer up, don't sound so depressed."
Classy. Just your typical "Glad your not dead. Just reiterating my dislike for you." call. Nice.
So anyways, you can bask in the glow of my non-demise and hollah at me when you get a chance. Aight?
I'm finished,
Nate
Tuesday, December 28, 2004
Call me pretentious.
I hope everyone had themselves a holly jolly one this year and will have a happy new year coming up. I got to have a good time at home with family and friends (except for Jaime, because I couldn't find Marinesco on a map, apparently.) The best part? I'm still eating leftovers.
Puttin in some extra hours this week to pay off some of the holiday fun. This full time, real world job for all its perks, sure takes a lot of work. Hmmm. Maybe I need to start looking for that newspaper column job. Something I can do when I get around to it at three in the morning. Plus, then I could tell everyone how I got a $20,000+ degree in Economic theory and I write stories...with horrendous punctuation.
This is also the first year in a long time that I don't have any solid plans for New Year's. In years past I have planned parties for New Year's like an architect lays out the plans for a building. I've mastered the art of beer aquisition in the same way a fisherman masters bait.
(The one year stands out, when Eazy-E and I hit up every buyer we knew for booze and our tally between the "I need a six of Bass Ale" and the "Might as well get a half gallon of whiskey!" ended up being over 100.00d. For one night. Only ever topped by "Everyone in Marquette drinks on Nate's tab night" which took place this past St. Patty's day.)
By the way, when has the phrase, "...get a half gallon of whiskey" ever turned out good? For me it's usually followed by incoherency and stories about when I was in the CIA. This year I'm going to play it by ear, maybe stay up until midnight and be a designated driver for any of my friends that prefer to partake in some holiday spirits. Yeah, sure I won't.
Oh, and I want everyone who reads this to post something on this message. Now that Jaime is leaving for Costa Rica, I need to evaluate my readers. You don't have to sign up, just leave an anonymous message with your name.
I'm finished,
Nate
Puttin in some extra hours this week to pay off some of the holiday fun. This full time, real world job for all its perks, sure takes a lot of work. Hmmm. Maybe I need to start looking for that newspaper column job. Something I can do when I get around to it at three in the morning. Plus, then I could tell everyone how I got a $20,000+ degree in Economic theory and I write stories...with horrendous punctuation.
This is also the first year in a long time that I don't have any solid plans for New Year's. In years past I have planned parties for New Year's like an architect lays out the plans for a building. I've mastered the art of beer aquisition in the same way a fisherman masters bait.
(The one year stands out, when Eazy-E and I hit up every buyer we knew for booze and our tally between the "I need a six of Bass Ale" and the "Might as well get a half gallon of whiskey!" ended up being over 100.00d. For one night. Only ever topped by "Everyone in Marquette drinks on Nate's tab night" which took place this past St. Patty's day.)
By the way, when has the phrase, "...get a half gallon of whiskey" ever turned out good? For me it's usually followed by incoherency and stories about when I was in the CIA. This year I'm going to play it by ear, maybe stay up until midnight and be a designated driver for any of my friends that prefer to partake in some holiday spirits. Yeah, sure I won't.
Oh, and I want everyone who reads this to post something on this message. Now that Jaime is leaving for Costa Rica, I need to evaluate my readers. You don't have to sign up, just leave an anonymous message with your name.
I'm finished,
Nate
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